I will never forget the day I posted those words, and the feedback I received on that post.
How was it that we were living in 2021 yet this was an unspoken concept, or an unaccepted truth for so many of us?
You are not for everyone- and that's ok.
I mean, it's the truth. Uncomfortable? Yes, maybe but 100% true.
Rejection had always crumbled me. It didn't matter if I had 100 people that loved and respected me, it was that one that didn't that rocked me to my core.
I would overanalyze everything.. What did I do? What could i have done differently? Why me? It was a suffocating insecurity that lead to the very moment I finally realized... wait.. who gives a shit?
Why on earth are we spending our days on this earth consumed with the very few people who don't like us. Furthermore, why would we change who we are to appease someone who wants us to change to their wants & needs? That's not a relationship and it's not healthy.
We all have differences, we all bring something new to the world and are all worthy of love and kindness.
Does that mean we will all be BFFs? Definitely not. But why is that so wrong? There are many people in this world that i don't necessarily "click" with but that doesn't mean I dislike them or think badly of them. We need to stop focusing on our differences and start focusing on ourselves- and what we can do to be the very best version of ourselves.
Believe it or not, there are actually some positives that come out of being disliked and accepting that..
It allows you to be yourself
No more changing to fit the image or exhausting yourself to please others. People can get to know the real you- complete with imperfections. How many times have we hidden certain aspects of ourselves because someone didn't like that? Ex: You're too loud, too bold, too opinionated. The heck with that! Do you friend! Don't allow the rules others set for you to be what holds you back. At the end of the day you are your own biggest fan and you need to stay true to yourself to find happiness in this world.
It allows you to offer genuine kindness.
It's so easy to be nice to nice people, but it is a whole other level of personal development when you do the right thing because it's the right thing- not because you get something out of it in return (bonus points if you do it even when no one is watching). Refocus your energy away from people who drain you and redirect it towards opportunities to spread kindness and love. Turn each negativity experience into a positive one through replacing it with kindness. I truly believe if we responded to each negative situation with 3 kind ones- what a world we would live in!
It allows you to have power to say no.
When you are comfortable in your own skin and true to yourself you will be at peace walking away from things that go against your morals or values. You will be able to redirect your energy towards doing good. Do not under any circumstances feel bad for someone taking your happiness. You are powerful, deserving and worthy of good things and you have the ability to walk away. Stop feeding the fire of negativity and turn around and walk away. Not only will you save yourself alot of stress but you will set the tone for future interactions too!
You can inspire other people.
By being unapologetically yourself you will inspire others to do the same. You will slowly etch away the idea that we have to please everyone. There are so many people out there that stand by in the face of negativity because they don't want to be alone. Be a leader, and step out of your comfort zone. You will be glad that you did. Kindness and self love is empowering- let it shine!
You can smile because of it.
Every situation is an opportunity for growth so approach each challenge as a chance to learn, whether its learning what you want or don't want or somewhere in between. Don't dwell on the negativity and don't allow it to consume you. Be thankful for the learning opportunity and move forward a better person. Be proud knowing you stayed true to yourself!